1st ANNUAL NON-WINNERS CLASSIC QUALIFIER/
INAUGURAL GALLETTA’S SPEEDWAY SCORING TOWER EVENT
Formerly Fort Crusher, now, the Galletta's Go-Kart Video/Announcer Tower
Above: The refurbished formerly “Fort Crusher” treehouse
(AKA Galletta’s Backyard Karting Speedway racing tower)!

 

"Fort Crusher" has now been re-christned "The Galletta's Karting VIP Camera Tower"! The tower gives us an all-new, exciting angle of the racing action! Thank you Ken, JR and Kris Pitsley for the donated window pane! What a find to find someone throwing them away, JR!This weekend was not only the debut of the newly refurbished “Treeless Treehouse”, “Fort Chrusher/Chrusher Coliseum Headquarters”, which has now become officially re-christened as “Galletta’s Speedway Official’s Scoring Tower”, but it was our first ever“Non-Winners Feature Classic Qualifier.” Only drivers who have not won a feature were invited to race (Note: Ogre hadn’t won in at least two years so he was allowed to compete). Of special note, whoever wins this event wins a guaranteed qualifying position in next week’s Dan Murdock Memorial “Galletta’s Classic Championship.”

Barrelin' Brian Bortel... has flipped again!

Barrelin’ Brian Bortel… has flipped… again!

   It was Gary Miller (and his #24) who proudly won his first feature event, holding off an equally fast and competitive Robbie Jimenez (in the Galletta’s #5) who was challenging for the lead for the majority of the race, but could not break through to his first win. Both drivers have made huge strides during their rookie campaigns, and everybody at the track was happy to see them finish 1-and-2 as predicted. However, the rest of the race was unfortunately marred with constant wrecks, unforced spinouts, and bad driving in general, making it one of the longest races in duration since the speedway adopted larger drive wheels, stronger chains, and increased stagger. There is a reason why some of these guys don’t win. 😉


Barrelin' Brian... has flipped.... again!
Above: Barreling Brain Bortel flips while leading. Chris Chrusher Stevens’ wife Au looks on in the tower. Comedic (or annoying, based on your opinion) race commentary by video taper Chris Stevens and Gary Miller’s son, Colin. Chris is usually out there, but he is a WINNER (WAHOO!)! [Comedy levels are disputed by Chris’ wife.]

Now, Brian, who’s motto is, “Brakes? Who needs f***in’ brakes?” got into a series of strange, mystifying, yet comedic acts. A barrel roll flip while leading AND then an ASSAULT ON A GO-KART! Let’s see!

Early on, the star of the show (and the DVD) was Barrelin’ Brian Bortel (above in his own #15 followed by Gary Miller), who led several laps early but then drove too hard in turn two and performed one of his patented barrel roll flips. Brian does this due to his inability to accept and admit the fact that brakes are indeed sometimes used in racing, and when you start to go off a track, you probably should (in theory) let off the gas and/or tap a brake. Maybe something to consider. Not telling you to do it. You know… like a suggestion. Or… like a clue. A tip, even!

But the day was not done for the barreling’ one. Coming back up through the field, Oswego Speedway Supermodified driver Kelly Miller(in the Galletta’s #0) washed into him in turn two causing a caution. Bortel was infuriated with Kelly, and while still connected with the #0, started raining blows upon Miller. Upon elbowing himself free, he bounced like a pinball off of the #4 of The Ogre and chased down the unsuspecting Kelly during caution, plowing into him two times, with a third hit launching his #15 up and over the #0’s rear which caused not only race-ending damage to his own kart, but causing a large abrasion on Kelly’s back.

While the episode was, in hindsight, fairly comedic to witness on tape, this activity is banned on this track, and if he or anybody else assaults another diver again, they will be indefinitely (and possibly permanently) suspended from Galletta’s Speedway.

  

    Exciting 2005 "Non-Winner's Race" at Galletta's Backyard Speedway 9/18/2005!Fast Flippin Freddy Collins charging in the Galletta's #2 kart!

Meanwhile, Fast/Flyin’/Flippin’/Furious Freddy Collins (in the Galletta’s #2) had one his best races in recent memory as he led many laps during the middle portion of the race as well, holding off challenges from Robbie in the #5.

Freddie C vs Robbie J! These guys just cannot race side-by-side!Unfortunately, in different stages of the race, Fast Freddy (above in blue) unintentionally washed out into both Rob (Above in the orange kart) and Josh “Porky Jr.” Schute (in the Galletta’s #7). Kenny Meynes (driving his father’s potent #18 kart) also impressed as he led late in the race for the 1st time in his career. However, while being challenged by Gary Miller with ten laps to go, Kenny lost control of the #18 and spun out in between turns three and four, which led to a rather comedic chain reaction wreck that sent Ogre’s #4 flying through the air with Flyin’ Freddy flipping off of the Deuce and landing conveniently in a Supermodified tire barrier.

Gary Miller leads a group of karts in the 1st non-winner's race on 9/18/2005 at Galletta's!
Above: Eventual winner Gary Miller leading Robbie Jimenez, Freddy Collins, Kenny Meynes, Eddie Scruton, Kelly Miller and Duke Patterson late for the win (his first and the 1st non-winner’s race ever). Wesley “Ogre” Stevens, proving again to be incompetent as he is the only veteran driver in this race of rookies [because he did not win yet in 2005], already O.F.T.N. (Out For The Night)! Here they speed by Au’s veggie garden.

Little Eddie Scruton took over the Galletta’s #6 kart mid-way after 1st-time driver Joe Crisafulli quit the ride complaining of other driver’s incompetent actions (um, he may have had a point with some of these guys — as they are almost all rookies [the big guns sat aside for this one], but at the same time he acted very childish in his angry temper tantrum tirade, and it left many questioning the man’s age), but some spectators and officials doubt if the young Scruton is physically strong enough to control the karts at full speed as he continuously wrecks all by himself in the physically demanding second corner. Another 1st-time driver, Duke Patterson drove the Galletta’s #1 to the finish, although he was a few laps down due to continuous stalling/spinning/wrecking violations Tom Murray (in his own #29) retired early with motor problems that must be fixed before the Classic if he intends to last the whole race. Tommy is a passionate young driver, but he has been plagued with severe motor problems. We hope Thomas can get things up to par before next weekend’s10th Annual Galletta’s Karting Klassic 135.

    Videotaped race (2-angles; both highly comedic and commentated by Chris Stevens and Gary Miller’s son Colin Miller). DVDs are now available for every videotaped event. Please contact Chris Stevens via email for ordering/buying a DVD that will contain anywhere from 2-4 races per disc.

9/18/05 40-Lap results:

1. (#24) Gary Miller Sr.
2. (#5) Rob Jimenez
3. (#2) Fred Collins
4. (#18) Kenny Meynes
—Completed less-than 40 Laps—
5. (#1) Duke Patterson
6.  (#0) Kelly Miller
7. (#7) Josh Schute
8. (#4) Wesley Ogre Stevens
9.  (#6) Eddie Scruton **
10. (#29) Tom Murray
11. (#15) Barrelin’ Brian Bortel
12. (#6) Cryin’ n’ Quittin’ Joe Crisafulli *

* = Completed the 1st 6 laps, then quit due to wrecks.
** = Joined race mid-stream (More than 6+ laps down).